"Fuck!" Say I

Because nobody rules over my thoughts. Live with it.

English Club: Week 2

Posted by The Bitch on 3/28/2009 05:28:00 AM

After having a great time in our first meeting, we continued the fun on the second. Here are the material we’d learned in our 2nd week meeting:

3. Simple Past Tense

Subject + V-ed
- Last night my husband gave me hickeys

Subject + did + not + verb
- Last night my husband didn’t give me hickeys

Did + subject + verb + object + ?
- Did your husband give you hickeys last night?

Function:

* Stating action in the past taking place once, never or several times
- We never fucked though we had been together for five years (ngapain aja?!).

* Stating actions taking place one after another
- He loved to suck my lower lip after having one mindblowing lovemaking session.

* Stating action taking place in the middle of another action
- He came in, unzipped his pants and banged her brain out.

* Stating action in the past taking place in the middle of another action
- When I was having her for breakfast, the phone suddenly rang.

* ‘If’ sentences type II (If I talked, …)
- If I had a lot of money, I would share it with you.

4. Simple Past Continuous

Subject + was/were + V-ing
- I was going fishing

Subject + was/were + not + V-ing
- I was not going fishing

Was/were + subject + V-ing + ?
- Were you going fishing?

Function:

* Puts emphasis on the course of an action in the past
- She was playing with my ball.

* Two actions happening at the same time (in the past)
- While she was undressing me, her mother was knocking on the door.

* Action going on at a certain time in the past
- When I was having my lunch, he was playing footsie up to my crotch under the table.

Vocab:
- Hickey
- Brooch
- Come
- Fishing
- Wrap

Here, we also learned reading comprehension from two reading materials googled once upon a night in an angkringan. No harm done. The Bitch Teacher got the material from the Internet since she was too busy to make ones. Hail Internet!

A Special Christmas Present

David wants to buy a Christmas present for a very special person, his mother. David’s father gives him $5.00 a week pocket money and David puts $2.00 a week into his bank account. After three months David takes $20.00 out of his bank account and goes to the shopping mall. He looks and looks for a perfect gift.

Suddenly he sees a beautiful brooch in the shape of his favourite pet. He says to himself, “My mother loves jewelry, and the brooch costs only $17.00.” He buys the brooch and takes it home. He wraps the present in Christmas paper and places it under the tree. He is very excited and he is looking forward to Christmas morning to see the joy on his mother’s face.

But when his mother opens the present she screams with fright because she sees a spider.

Comprehension
1. What does David want to buy his Mother?
a. a special birthday present
b. a Christmas present
c. a spider ring

2. Who does David get his money from?
a. his pet
b. his mother
c. his father

3. How much money does David have in the bank?
a. $24.00
b. $5.00
c. $17.00

4. What does David buy his mother?
a. a ring
b. a brooch
c. a spider

5. What does David do with the present when he takes it home?
a. he gives it to his mother
b. he wraps it in Christmas paper
c. he is very excited

6. Why does David’s mother scream?
a. because the present is beautiful
b. because she doesn’t like Christmas presents
c. because she thinks she sees a real spider

7. Why does David buy a spider brooch?
a. spiders are his favourite pet
b. he loves Christmas
c. to scare his mother

8. Where does David put the present on Christmas Eve?
a. under his pillow
b. under a spider
c. under the Christmas tree

Two sisters and the cat

Mrs. Wilson and Mrs. Smith are sisters. Mrs. Wilson lives in a house in Duncan and Mrs. Smith lives in a condominium in Victoria. One day Mrs. Wilson visited her sister. When her sister answered the door, Mrs. Wilson saw tears in her eyes. “What’s the matter?” she asked. Mrs. Smith said “My cat Sammy died last night and I have no place to bury him”.

She began to cry again. Mrs. Wilson was very sad because she knew her sister loved the cat very much. Suddenly Mrs.. Wilson said “I can bury your cat in my garden in Duncan and you can come and visit him sometimes.” Mrs. Smith stopped crying and the two sisters had tea together and a nice visit.

It was now five o’clock and Mrs. Wilson said it was time for her to go home. She put on her hat, coat and gloves and Mrs. Smith put the dead Sammy into a shopping bag. Mrs. Wilson took the shopping bag and walked to the bus stop. She waited a long time for the bus so she bought a newspaper. When the bus arrived, she got on the bus, sat down and put the shopping bag on the floor beside her feet. She then began to read the newspaper. When the bus arrived at her bus stop, she got off the bus and walked for about two minutes. Suddenly she remembered she had left the shopping bag on the bus.
[Story by Laurie Buchanan]

Comprehension
1. Where does Mrs. Smith live?
a. in a condominium in Duncan
b. in a condominium in Victoria
c. in a house in Duncan

2. Why is Mrs. Smith upset?
a. because her sister came to see her cat
b. because her cat died
c. because Mrs. Wilson was sad

3. What did Mrs. Wilson do?
a. take the cat with her on the bus
b. put her gloves in the shopping bag
c. prepare dinner for her sister

4. Who did Sammy the cat live with?
a. Mrs. Wilson
b. Mrs. Smith
c. Mrs. Wilson and Mrs. Smith

5. What time did Mrs. Wilson go home?
a. when the bus arrived
b. at 5 p.m.
c. after she walked for two minutes

6. How did Mrs. Wilson go home?
a. walked for two minutes before she caught the bus
b. read a newspaper on the bus
c. took a bus

7. What did Mrs. Wilson forget?
a. the newspaper
b. her handbag
c. the shopping bag

8. Where did Sammy die?
a. in Mrs. Smith’s house in Duncan
b. in Mrs. Wilson’s garden
c. in Victoria

All reading materials are taken from here.

Again, The Bitch Teacher wants to remind her students about the rule: Turn all of your fuckin’ mobile off when you’re in her class, do as she says, and OBEY! Or you all could feel her wrath!

Damn. Teaching is sooo fuckin’ fun!

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